Last updated 18 June 2009
Video: So Much Magnificence
Miten & Deva Premal
Source: www.youtube.com
Please watch in high quality.The video opens in a separate window
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. It is your mind that creates the world.
Relaxation?
What do you mean by relaxation? Sitting down reading a book? Listening to music? Watching TV? Meeting up with friends or family? Having a few drinks socially? The list is different for us all, because it depends upon what we find relaxes us.
When we’re talking about relaxation in terms of technique and managing stress, it’s more than participating in or undertaking these activities that we think of as being relaxing activities. It means controlling levels of “arousal” through controlling our thoughts; it is our thoughts – often unconscious and unsummoned thoughts – that cause us to feel and experience emotions. These emotions lead us to acting or behaving in a way that expresses those emotions.
When we experience happiness and positive emotions and feelings, it is instigated by happy and contented thoughts and the resulting behaviour might be to laugh, participate in activities that we enjoy, generate more happy thoughts, good feelings about ourselves and others and we behave contentedly.
When we experience unhappiness and negative emotions and feelings, it is instigated by unhappy and discontented thoughts and the resulting behaviour might be to cry, have outbursts of anger, generate more unhappy thoughts, bad feelings about ourselves and others and we behave dis-contentedly.
We very often take contentment for granted: the very nature of feeling contented causes us to be at peace with ourselves and with the world around us. It makes us feel we can do anything we want to do, within our scope of reason, and we don’t give more than a passing thought, if that, as to why we feel as we do.
Our experiences are very different, however, when we feel discontented, our “self-talk” – the thoughts so often jumbled up in our minds to begin with seem to latch on to those thoughts that are consistently negative – create negative emotions inside us, make us believe the thoughts are true, we don’t need to question them, in fact we don’t “reason” them out, and the resulting emotions we feel cause us to behave in a depressed, worried, angry, sad way ….. so many labels for negative behaviours, that are simply a result of the emotions we are experiencing – all due to those negative “automatic”, often unsummoned and untrue thoughts.
We then take for granted “this is how I am”. We apportion blame: sometimes we credit other people with blame: “it’s them”, “it’s their fault”, “they are to blame for this”, “they are stupid”, “they are of no value to me”; sometimes we blame ourselves – “it’s me”, “it’s my own fault”, “I am stupid”, “I am worthless”.
The words that I have used in that last paragraph may not be the ACTUAL words that pass through our minds – we all have our own way of unconsciously expressing automatic negative thoughts – and very often they are single fleeting words and/or images and difficult to define. If we attempt to harness what our “negative self talk” is, we find it hard to do; have you ever wondered what thoughts ACTUALLY go through your mind when you feel happy? Try to do it now……
Is it more like a feeling than words? Do you think of an image or several images together rather than “think words”?
How would you “feel” about taking control of these thoughts, images, and therefore taking control of what is going on in your own mind? Have you even considered the possibility before?
Does that question make you respond “Well, that’s pretty dumb! How could I possibly do that?” or maybe: “I’ve tried to do that, but I can’t”?
And if you are thinking along these lines, are you now thinking to yourself:”This is ok for other people, but it wouldn’t work for me”
If you are thinking along those lines, you are normal – like all of us before we ever tried it.
This is a standard, normal, very realistic response – automatic or deliberate!
What do we ever learn through our “normal” life experiences about this kind of thing? Who teaches us? If no one teaches us – how can we learn and how can we know if it works or doesn’t work?
It’s good to question
The fact that you have questions going through your mind is a good and very healthy response. We are autonomous individuals. We all have our own agendas – whether we know we have them or not – and if you are unsure whether or not you have control of your own thought processes, a really good place to start is with using some basic techniques of relaxation. Using these exercises, will help you to use “attentional focus”. You choose – you get. Do you feel you have NO CHOICE? Well, actually, you DO have a choice. We all have a choice. And understanding that THAT is a fact may be the beginning of your transformation if you need it.
The breathing and physiological exercises that follow are widely available:
Breathing Exercise:
If you have read through the preceding paragraphs, I guess you must be pretty keen to have a go! Read the instructions very carefully; make sure your technique is correct. The technique of “breathing” – tummy out on the in-breath, in on the out-breath is very important.
I use these exercises all the time with patients one to one and in groups, and I am really interested in how they come across to those of you reading about it on-line and trying it out without direct access to the therapist.
Here are the exercises:
Relaxation Exercises
Relaxation recordings
Free to download as used during weeks 2 through to 5 of the Tinnitus E-Programme:
In MP3 format:
Each of the above recordings are approximately 30 minutes long, were originally in cassette tape form and have been transferred to other formats. The speaker in Relaxation 1 and 2 is unknown, however Relaxation 3 and 4 are by kind courtesy of Anthony Wuyts. Hundreds of people have benefited from using these four exercises.
It is recommended that you first use the breathing exercise (pdf file above) on a regular basis for at least a week. Then, continuing to use the breathing exercise at least 3 times each day, use Relaxation 1 every day for one week, Relaxation 2 every day for one week, Relaxation 3 every day during the third week and Relaxation 4 every day during the fourth week.
At the end of the 5 week period, continue to use one of the recorded exercises (which ever you prefer) on a daily basis for a further 5 weeks.
Thereafter, it is recommended that you continue to use one of the recorded relaxation exercises (whichever you prefer) at least once or twice each week. By doing this, you will be able to maintain the benefit gained over the previous weeks.
If you are unable to play these recordings in MP3 format, they are available in other formats inluding on CD, however, there would be a charge for handling and postage of CDs. Please use the Contact Us link to request CDs or send an email to debbiefeatherstone@clitheroetherapies.co.uk .
